“I’m on a diet,” my friend said to me over lunch the other day. She is going to consciously choose what she is going to put inside her body from now on and she is going to make that her daily habit.

And I thought of our habits, our daily habits per se. You know, the things that we do every single day that are not helping us to progress further.

Observe your daily habits, my friend. Look to see what behaviors you are indulging in over and over again that are clearly not serving you.

Stop doing the stuff you’re doing that obviously does not serve you – or others.

---

This is how I do it (Improve My Daily Habits)

I do a ton of inner work for improving my daily habits.

I make sure that the external environment will not take control of me. I concentrate on what I can do about the situation that is facing me. I know that I will mess things up royally if I don’t focus on the work that I have to do inside of me.

I’ve learned that NOT holding grudges is the best medicine to live lightly and peacefully.

So, I follow this habit every day. If I feel anger, resentment or any other ill-thought towards anyone, I take a break from everything. I use that alone quiet time to name what I am feeling. And I choose to let go.

I need time alone and I need silence and that helps me in my daily habits.

I get to do my best work every time I have alone time. This is important because all the hard work that we do every day will creep up our spine like an army of spiders – draining our energy from the inside.

So, I seek silence every day to recharge.

Bonus: Make sure that you are without any kind of technology in those alone times and if you can, go outside. Be with nature.

I use positive words.

It’s not easy to be positive when most people gravitate towards negativity. But, I choose to be positive. I choose to use my words for good.

And I’ve seen that optimism is like an annoying infectious good mood.

It’s joy rising up from deep inside you: a sunrise, a balloon, a bright white light.

I make sure that taking action is my daily habit on the things I’m pursuing.

I write every single day. For you and other publications. I do this whether I feel like writing or not.

I do this because action begets motivation – not the other way around.

I’d rather be motivated by the action that I take than waiting for “feeling like it.”

We’d wait forever if we wait to be fully inspired. Because inspiration is a feeling and like any feeling, it changes. Sometimes it is there, sometimes it is not.

Why are we willing to walk away from the thing we want– by waiting to be inspired enough?

You make yourself the backup, the fallback, and a second choice.

Inspiration or motivation is not the secret to success.

Be happy.

Happiness is not something that you wait for. It exists within you. You’re only ripping yourself apart by keeping happiness at bay.

By waiting for it, you have become a place holder. Something to tide you over between now and when you get what you are looking for.

My friend, happiness is not found from an external source.

Let us stop self-sabotaging our own happiness.

I remind myself daily that everyone has a unique perspective.

We can even learn from these other perspectives if only we are willing to listen.

Every single person on this planet walks around with a unique narrative. And if we care to listen closely enough, we’ll find some truth in each and every one them.

I communicate clearly and that is an essential daily habit to have for healthy conversations.

Not just because I give training on the subject matter but also because it is the most effective way to have healthy conversations.

As much as possible, I do not use silence or passive-aggressiveness as a way of communication. I don’t want to manipulate others.

So, I speak what is on my mind – without decrypting the words I use.

If I have nothing to say, I embrace silence.

I’ve no desire to argue ceaselessly and pointlessly.

I’ve learned that throwing verbal punching bags is pointless.

This “arguing until someone wins” hurts all the way to the bone.

My friend, grow some sense before the stress gives you an ulcer.

Arguing with others is really boring. And, there are battles you lose even if you win. We have to know the difference between having a conversation and confrontation. We have to learn to have empathic communications.

Be present.

Don’t just be physically available.

Let your whole body and mind be with the other person. Actively listen. Turn off your internal dialogue when you are communicating with others.

I value empathy.

This means putting myself in the shoe of others. I’m learning daily the qualities that every person should have to be emotionally intelligent.

Face your fear and make that your daily habit.

I never thought I would have such an audience for my writing. I never thought that my writings would be published in big publications like the Ascent and The Post-Guide-Survival on Medium.

I wanted to, believe me. But I was too afraid. Afraid that I would not succeed. Afraid that I would not be a good writer as there are brilliant writers all over the world. Afraid that no one would read a single article from me.

But I did it. By facing my fear.

Are you afraid of applying for a job you are not sure you can do? Go ahead and apply.

Are you afraid to tell someone how you feel? Face your fear. Go to that person and ask the person to have coffee together. Talk to that person.

Are you afraid to face an awkward situation? Walk towards it.

I’ve learned that love is an action – Not just a feeling.

Show the people you love “your love” by the actions you choose to take every single day. Don’t just say “I love you.”

Love is not a quid pro quo.

Your loved ones are not a ribbon on top of a package.

I’m self-aware.

Self-awareness has given me a lot. I no more give power to anger. The moment I realize that anger is taking control of me, I pause. I don’t want to hold the thing that is making me burn from the inside-out. So, I let it go.

I’ve learned the greatest enemy of my anger is me – Not the person who made me angry. I’ve learned to use positive outlets for my anger.

I’m able to do this because I’m practicing self-awareness daily.

Self-awareness is the secret sauce for controlling any emotions that you don’t want to indulge.

---

As always,

To your inspirations,

Banchi