Stories of Black Women
Nobody can bulletproof a relationship because bullets come from the outside and things that shatter a relationship come from the inside. Casually thrown hurtful words Words are like bullets. Once you pull the trigger, you can’t take them back. You can express remorse or say you are sorry, but that is not the same. We …
Without the willingness to build a relationship, love loses its luster. Have you ever thought you could love someone enough to make your relationship work? Have you been in a relationship where you knew you weren’t thrilled, but you kept saying, “I love him. Isn’t that enough?” When my ex whispered his love, a grin …
# 2. Work at your relationship when there are no more grasslands. No green pastures. No streamlined rivers. No rainbows. I have a friend whose relationship is different from mine. I have a whole life without my partner: friends, interests, and pursuits. I don’t want him to be with me all the time. I’ve learned …
#4. Pursue deeply personal interests. Things went south and she knew deep in her heart she was right and her husband was wrong. And yet… She treated him with kindness, respect, and dignity. I know this man. He’s one of my students. His wife has the kind of beauty that stops traffic. When this man …
We kill our relationship in the very hands that carved it. You know that feeling in the pit of your stomach that tells you that you can’t wait to see your love, that you can’t sleep or eat or do anything because you are counting the minutes till you see him again? Is it time …
Do something, anything to demolish indifference before someone you love becomes a roommate, an acquaintance, a stranger. “When you love someone, the best thing you can offer is your presence. How can you love if you are not there?” — Thich Nhat Hanh Indifference is not caring what the other person thinks, feels, and does …
If someone you love cheated on you, this one is for you. The sun had barely crested the horizon when I saw the man I loved for 4 years kissing another woman on the hospital bed. I wanted to unsee what my eyes saw. I averted my eyes and looked out the window at the …
When you love someone, you choose to see yourself and your partner as separate entities. In healthy love, you are individuals having your own dreams, likes, wants, and needs. You each have your whole lives without the other. You choose to honor what your partner wants even if you don’t want that thing. When you …
2. You abandon parts of you (from your hobbies to your friends to your job). I don’t buy into the notion that commitment has to mean detention, confinement, obligation, or burden. I’m committed to who my partner is and to who he can be rather than committed to the things that bind us, or the …
# 2. Possessive love prisons someone you love Their relationship was not only potentially toxic but combustible. It threatened to self-destruct by the time you finished reading this article. My friend would say she needed space but her boyfriend never allowed her space. He never allowed her to be on her own. She loved it …