Here are ways you can stop banging your head against a wall and instead walk through an open door.

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Yes, yes. Persevere. Endure. Push forward, steadfast. Don’t ever quit. Except, sometimes quitting is good for you.

What is this effort and pride — without any reward — costing you? Are there amazing things you could be doing with the same amount of grit? Do you always feel like you are swimming against the current and never, ever carried away along by it, not even for a moment? Do you feel like you’ve tried everything and nothing seems to budge? Do you feel like something is always caught in your throat?

If so, I have a question for you.

What are you doing?

Quitting will set you free. It will restore your energy. You can focus on something else. And who knows? Maybe you need to quit so you can regain your strength to return to battle on a better day.

Here are ways you can know when to quit:

When there’s no degree of joy, of happiness, of satisfaction, in whatever it is you’re trying to do.

If you are in a situation where you work and work and work more and nothing much changes, then you need to get off it, fast. It is keeping you from doing something else.

Maybe you need to cut your losses and try your hand at something else.

Why are you so intent on this? Is it because you love it, because you dream of it? Or, are you afraid? Afraid to quit, afraid of what it will say about you, afraid you will disappoint someone you love? Or, you are afraid of putting so much time into it you might as well see it through.

If fear or ego are the motivators behind your reasons, it is time to look yourself in the mirror.

If anybody had a reason not to quit because of his accomplishments, it was Michael Crichton. The best-selling author had graduated from Harvard Medical School. He had done a post-doctoral fellowship study at the Salk Institute for Biological Studies.

Crichton quit even though it was a guarantee there would be a lucrative career as a Doctor or as a researcher.

He traded all these accomplishments for the unpredictable life of an author.

Why?

Because he didn’t want to spend the rest of his life doing something he didn’t enjoy to preserve his pride.

If whatever you’re trying to do feels exhausting all the time. If you don’t like yourself anymore and frustration has become your norm. If you are up all night worrying. Then reconsider what you are doing.

When all you are trying to do is not quitting.

If all you are trying to do is not quitting, then why are you bothering?

In Seth Godin book, The Dip, Godin explains the dip we all face when we are pursuing something.

At first, everything is beautiful. You’re starting something. Your motivation is high. You tell all your friends about your big startup. You’re having fun. Sunshine fills your world.

But then comes the dip.

You can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel. Customers are not happy with your product. No publisher has approached you for your book. Competitors are snatching your customers.

You are in the dip. And you hate it.

What to do? To quit? Or, to move forward even if it is through crawling?

If your reason not to quit is because of pride or fear, you don’t care about reaching your light at the end of the tunnel. If you do, something stronger would push you to keep going.

Like the Microsoft people did.

“Microsoft failed twice with Windows, four times with Word, three times with Excel. The entire company is based on the idea of slogging through the dip, relentlessly changing tactics but never quitting the big idea.” — Seth Godin, The Dip

There is something out there you would do everything in your power to come out a winner. But that is only possible if you are trying not to quit. But also to be number 1 in your field.

We have never heard of Usain Bolt using words like ‘I am running because I don’t want to quit running’. He runs because he wants to be the fastest man in the world.

If all you’re trying to do is not quit, that thing doesn’t even have a light grip on your heart. And you don’t care about it that much.

Ask yourself these questions:

Are you curious about whatever you are trying to achieve?

Do you have an interest in offering something to others?

Is your heart open to the possibilities life has for you in regards to your thing?

If not, then it is better to quit. Because the road ahead is not paved with chocolate. You are going to face many obstacles in your journey.

When you’re flipping the light off the challenges you are facing.

Not one time, but all the time.

I don’t always feel like facing critics who tell me what is wrong with my writing. Sometimes I flip them off. I don’t want to hear or think about them.

But flipping something I don’t like is not a regular thing for me.

If you’re always flipping the challenges blocking your way, then you don’t care about whatever it is you are pursuing. It’s time to look for something that will force you to look at your challenges in the eye.

Here are ways you can tell you are flipping the light off your problems:

. Instead of finding ways to come out of the dip, you distract yourself with other things. Like talking about anything else but the problem you are facing. Like Social Media. Like complaining to your friend on the phone on how unfair life is to you, all the time.

You think you are doing something but you are not.

. Instead of improving one skill and seeing one thing through, you try many things. Failing in all of them. Something unexpected stands in front of your road, you turn back and look for other roads.

“A woodpecker can tap twenty times on a thousand trees and get nowhere, but stay busy. Or he can tap twenty-thousand times on one tree and get dinner.” Seth Godin

If your heart is not screaming at you to return and dare to look at the challenges you are facing, it is time to quit. Because your heart is not crying with the loss.

When you are not sacrificing other things

Everything in life is a trade-off. You give up one thing for another.

Are you giving up other things for what you are pursuing?

That project you want to do but fear is holding you back. That bakery you want to own but are too scared to ask for a loan. That dream of becoming a writer but you don’t have time to sit down and write.

If you don’t say a big YES to what you want, you would miss a grand adventure life has in store for you.

So, if you don’t have a strong yes, then you need to quit so that you can find something you will say yes to, no matter what.

If you have a strong yes and you are not sacrificing other things, then ask yourself whether you want it. Do you want to pursue this thing more than others?

Because you cannot have everything.

You need to sacrifice other things to have what you want. You need to reduce time with your buddies to work on your project. You need to be okay with taking out money from your bank account. Or ask for a loan. You need to sacrifice sleep so that you can write before you go to work.

You don’t get anything worthwhile without sacrifices.

When you don’t show up for yourself.

The dip is there for every person on the planet. You start something. But somewhere along the way, the road becomes too hard to walk let alone run. Too hard to stand up let alone walk.

You know when to quit when you have no intention of showing up for yourself. You want to get out of this road that has become a nightmare.

There is no deep burning desire in you that pushes you to keep going. To fight the storm. To find a solution.

You turn around and never glance at the road you have abandoned.

It happens and it is okay. Go find another road where you would choose to walk through a fog. Where you would choose to crawl to pass through. Where you would not even think of abandoning it. Where you would keep on showing up.

“Successful people don’t just ride out the Dip. They don’t just buckle down and survive it. No, they lean into the Dip. They push harder, changing the rules as they go. Just because you know you’re in the Dip doesn’t mean you have to live happily with it. Dips don’t last long quite as long as when you whittle at them.” — Seth Godin

When you’re not making some sort of forwarding progress.

If a storm is still blocking your door. Not for a few months but years and years. If the wave is crushing you and you’ve not seen the shore even once. And this wave is trying to take the air out of you, all the time.

Reconsider the path you are on.

If you’re not getting happy customers after a while. If you do not have a few email subscribers — even 100 loyal readers. If you do not see some sort of forwarding progress.

Reconsider the path you are on.

I had a colleague who was in this exact spot. His students did not like his teaching methods. He saw the way other trainers like my colleagues and I gave classes. He tried his best. I used to see this former colleague in the library reading books like Dale Carnegie’s public speaking book.

He had effort in spades. But he was not successful at teaching his class.

He did this for a year. And still, his students did not like his teaching. He was miserable.

So, what did I tell him? To quit.

Quitting was good for him.

He needed to breathe. Feeling like you are running out of air all the time is not good. And I had seen how good he was at something else. Maintaining computers. Every time a desktop or a laptop needed some sort of repair, he was the king of maintenance.

I remember one time arriving at the office at 7 am and he was there maintaining our computers. He had been in his element before our first cup of coffee.

I had a feeling he likes himself and the work he does with computers. There was no irritation in his voice when he told me he spent the night there. Talking to his computers.

Refusing to quit — when you are not progressing –is stealing your time and energy from something else.

I’m glad my friend had quit his job as a trainer. He has a computer maintenance shop now.

Had he not quit, he would still be trying to swim against the current and never, ever carried by it.

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The sunk cost fallacy is flawed reasoning. If fear or ego are the reasons behind your refusal to quit, that reasoning is costing you. If you are afraid of what quitting will say about you. If you are afraid of disappointing your family. If you are afraid you have put years and years into it and you think you might as well see it through.

Reconsider what you are doing.

You deserve more.

You deserve to pursue something out of love. You deserve to pursue something because you dream of it. You deserve to pursue something because there is a degree of joy, happiness, and satisfaction in you.

You deserve no less.

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To your inspirations,

Banchi